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Sunday, November 12, 2006

Thought: past|present|future

so one moves on 
come what may. 

may the addict find what he is looking for in this life 
and someday appreciate the process appreciation to those around them. 

those relationships are never meant to be long term anyway. not in an addicts view. 

just a stepping stone to the next ones. unless the bridge is burned.

perhaps someday the addict will return to redeem them.
"Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other gold."

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Thought: bleeding heart....



so the heart does bleed. 
no relation with addicts ever work out in the end. by the time you work the issues, and one heals, the other heals - it's time to part ways. for the addict awakes to life in a new fresh vision and the old and present just don't fit or hold the key to happiness anymore. so again the co-dep loses. walked over, stepped on, used, abused and left in the dust while the addict continues their wholeness qwest for what was lost. 

personal note: 
i alway liked new beginnings. in fact that is the cycle of my life since birth. a lifestyle of military moves, every 3 years until now. i have no roots, nor long term friends. if i don't move, the furnature changes. friends come and go. i remain the same. sojourner. wanderer. after all my name means beautiful sojourner, a stranger....

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Monday, November 6, 2006

Watch Akeela and the Bee!



doesn't everyone desire to be whole? 
everything on earth moves towards homeostasis in all forms. it's when we aren't working with the natural impulse to be well by masking and covering pain with drugs, or other ism's that we lose our self.  (Homeostasis: Wholeness in life)

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” -- Our Deepest Fear by Marianne Williamson

watch akeela and the bee.... to overcome or fail is a choice....
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the truth is...



it's unclear who really is well
in a dysfunctional relationships. even the strongest soul can be affected and torn by generational brokeness when you live intimately in such situations. Perhaps we all should focus on fixing ourselves as the major purpose of the 20's rather than the push to make families, careers etc. happen. if one waits to long they shatter souls along their path of discovering they are NOT whole.
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Sunday, November 5, 2006

Thought: No Escape



there is no escape button. 
even when you start out as helping someone. no matter how strong you are the addiction wins in making you a victim. there is no other way out but to be totally separate. the picture and link to the site puts it exactly how it is. one can only help themselves. i lost. i became a part of another's addiction habit and descent into "hell" . 

no one to blame. but now i see clearly, i can only know this: THIS ABOVE ALL ELSE TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE...
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