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Thursday, May 20, 2010

Heal-Live-Dream Mouse Pad from Zazzle.com


Handy reminder to live for the now...

Heal-Live-Dream Mouse Pad from Zazzle.com























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Wednesday, May 19, 2010

addictShun | addictions

I thought it time to explain why I used the title in this blog. Since I write from the viewpoint of a "non-addict" (if there is such a thing in the purest sense of the word), I needed a term that showed what happens to someone involved with an addict. 

I came up with the work: addictShun. Shun meaning to persistently avoid, ignore or reject someone or something through antipathy or caution. Therefore one who lives with and loves an addict must also shun what they live with. The addict's existence is driven by their substance causing those around them to "shun" their choices, and lifestyle. Both sides of addiction equal a vicious cycle of costs and loss, as well as an inharmonious, complex relationship.

It's my view that since the fall of mankind in the Garden of Eden we are all *broken, each with our own weakness and bent. To me brokenness is not a 360-degree existence either. No one is TOTALLY broken or whole for that matter. It's also my belief that addictions can be broken and one can find wholeness and harmony with the people around them. There is hope and light for freedom and recovery, once we begin to honestly search for answers and heal our past. Only then can we live in our present life without the failures dragging us down. I encourage you to look up the topic FORGIVENESS a starting point from which all healing begins. 
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I've written several posts on this linked below:

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Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Addicted to work?

10 years of loyalty and devotion to a company in this day and age is quite remarkable with the job-hopping work culture. Allegiance wears thin when corporations squeeze the life out of field management to gain company financial goals without affirming employee’s needs for balance. Greater workloads, longer hours, microscopic pay raise with less support and reward, dries the soul.  

In light of these changes along with being micromanaged to a point of despair I decided I want to QUIT. Daily, I through up my hands wondering, what the heck do think we are? Are we robots with no life or breath? Weeks pass by with the growing miserable knowledge that I no longer have a heart for this company or work. HOW do I tell my boss? What will I do without the paycheck and other stable benefits? Half of me still love the people with 10 years of historical relationship built up. The other half wants to run into the sunset without looking back. 

The struggle to simply say I QUIT or weasel out rolls round and round my mind. I feel pulled in two pieces. One of me needs to win. This feels like out of control addiction. Surely there is life outside this company and I won't fall apart, starve or die if I do leave. There are other ways to live then getting WORK text messages until 9pm at night and every weekend morning beginning with the rise of the sun as to "How are your numbers going? You need 15 more orders!" 

I lay out the choices on paper. Carefully listed are all skills, talents and strengths and what I really want to do. I match them against weaknesses dislikes and losses caused by my current workload. My inner voice tells me to leave and find a fresh new beginning. I can be free! My gut turns into a knot telling me the doubts and fears of leaving well enough alone, just stay you lousy quitter. The pain and misery you know is better than the unknown.

Is it possible to be "addicted" to work? It certainly feels like it. This company has become a chain around my neck with all the hooked "benefits" and not one reason to actually love what I do. Anymore that is! Who knows, I just may snap and quit in a fleeting moment. Meanwhile one side has to win and I have an inkling, which one will. Will it be my creative, spontaneous side or the grinding, overly responsible one? Only time will tell.
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Saturday, May 1, 2010

Forgiveness equals healing

Forgiveness defined by Webster Dictionary: 
To give up resentment of or claim to requital for b: to grant relief from payment of , 2: to cease to feel resentment against (an offender): pardon willing or able to forgive, 3: allowing room for error or weakness.

Addiction plays a big part in hiding wounds never healing. Childhood offenses, injuries done during adolescence or any pain covered over fester into adulthood. Resentment naturally follows emotional or mental pain. Resentment turns to bitterness, to anger, then to self-destruction and unwillingness to forgive offenders. In addictive families, the next logical step is to cover the wounds with substances. The role models showed that it is easier to slam down a beer or smoke a joint then to talk things out with one another. Substance abuse is the salve that keeps the wounds from throbbing.

HURT, ANGER, RESENTMENT is underneath every ADDICTION. It's the vicious cycle repeating itself. It's a weed continually growing when left alone. "She hurt me, life sucks it's all too much - so I drink, smoke and medicate myself to no pain." No pain, no gain, life stops. That is until the bottom falls out of your life. Is this where you are now? Think about it... Where else can you go? Everyone around you hates the addiction and you have burned all your bridges. Your substance will NEVER save you. Begin by looking deep. You know where and when it all started. Open that tightly clutched hand to see the wound of your soul. Start the cleansing act of forgiveness NOW.

So, look at the defining words of forgiveness. First, find those who you resent and hold unforgiveness. Allow for their weakness and fault then choose to forgive. Don't forget self-forgiveness and pardoning of you. Ask your higher Power, GOD, to help you and make you willing. Holding onto resentment only hurts you. Try to make amends, if not then let it all go. It is not worth holding onto the pain. Look at where you are now. Did that resentment change anything to make the other person suffer? NO. It only harmed you. So, let it go. Be free. FORGIVE. Say now "I forgive myself and all those who have caused me pain." No matter how great the wound. Forgiveness heals.






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